Call me Cursed

1.5M ratings
277k ratings

See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna
punkitt-is-here
sreegs

the post-automattic tumblr employees (automatticians, iirc) that are publicly posting as staff and trying to argue with tumblr users who vehemently hate the site are so adorable. this is how it's always been. users pretty much hate staff. this is why, in the old days, it was discouraged to identify as staff unless you had the stomach to put up with a bunch of hate mail and arguments.

you're also not going to win over any users by describing tumblrinas as ungrateful for the site's existence, or unreasonably angry over recent changes. you're just gonna look like a 30+ year old engineer taking pot shots at teenagers.

tumblr's current owner (automattic) got some trust back early in the acquisition when they greenlit some changes users had wanted, and ad-free went over mostly smoothly, but any trust you had was shattered with Tumblr Live. The snarky posts from automatticians are making it worse, the worst offender being the person you have running emporium.

this is how tumblr users have always acted before automattic came in and bought tumblr. this is not new. this is why users say things like "staff is out of touch".

y'all need to understand this before you try to snap back at angry users, or before you make vagueposts insinuating the tumblrinas are ungrateful.

maybe examine why tumblr users are angry, what they're angry with, accept they're valid reasons to be angry, and question why these business decisions are being made. like, "hey yeah why is tumblr live still there if everyone hates it?" or "why does moderation seem worse these days?".

then maybe if you understand what's causing the anger when users say "fuck staff" and you'll know not to take it personally. maybe you can take the urge to post snarky replies and redirect it to questioning your bosses' decisions to go ahead with these features that are universally hated

learn, adapt, overcome.

read, comprehend, post.

or just stop posting

boggmann
tyrannuspitch

still so fucking weird to go from real life, where a cis man being flamboyant/effeminate/camp is judged like 70+% by how he speaks and carries himself, to online queer communities, which often seem to have no concept of male gender non-conformity that doesn’t involve wearing a skirt

tyrannuspitch

i promise you, a man can be fem to the point of being in danger while wearing literally exactly the same thing as a hypermasculine guy. a boring basic black suit. a t shirt and jeans. a UNIFORM. gender conformity is not only about what you wear

unbidden-yidden

None of you have watched that heartbreaking scene in The Birdcage where Albert gives up wearing everything he likes to try and blend in for their son’s conservative prospective in-laws and is so awkward and uncomfortable that no one says much until finally he says, defeated, “I know what you’re thinking - dressed like this, I’m even more obvious, aren’t I?” and it shows.

unbidden-yidden

Here, have your queer heart broken:

This is what I’m talking about. This is still literally how it is in most places in the Midwest if you’re trying to “pass” for straight/cis/whatever.

netherworldpost

I cannot begin to describe how hard I cried when I saw this scene the first time and how confused my conservative family was as to why I was crying.

kinka-juice

It’s so funny how literally the way a man holds his wrists is an indication of femininity but also people think it’s all about makeup and clothing. But we’re also at a point that if you have a suit that is any color other than black, dark grey, or navy, it’s flamboyant.

Men’s sartorial stylings are so rigidly controlled it’s painful. Tim Gunn here is at the very absolute bleeding edge of “acceptably masculine” here for most cishet men, just for some noticible stripes, patterns, and purple, and that’s before he even moves. This is how restricted it is.

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But Trixie Mattel (out of drag here) wearing standard masculine garb is could still be deemed unacceptably feminine for body language alone.

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flameraven

This is why we talk about “toxic masculinity” – the idea that any expression of emotion besides anger or even wearing colorful clothes is non-masculine and therefore restricted is horrifying. It sucks! Men should be allowed to express themselves outside of a tiny box of acceptable behavior, because they’re, y'know, people, and people have a wide range of expression in the way they like to look and move and act.

I honestly feel like it’s gotten worse over the last couple decades, too. If you look at men’s fashions from the 70s and even into the 80s, there’s a lot of style choices that look pretty cringe to us, but…. you also see a lot more color and pattern in suits than you do now. I’m not sure when this started to shift, or if it’s tied in to the increasing lack of color in all consumer products, but it sucks.

inneskeeper
inneskeeper

"I don't like the Jack Harkness test because it means it's okay to fuck Scooby Doo"

yes that's the entire damn point of the Harkness test. The Harkness Test doesn't exist to say you have to fuck Scooby Doo. The Harkness Test exists to say that it is morally/ethically fine for someone to want to fuck Scooby Doo, because Scooby Doo can give informed consent and communicate as such.

the reason you don't like it is because none of you are self-aware enough to realize how incredibly fucking puritan all of you are when it comes to fucking

sethprotector

Tumblr being free is humanity's greatest error.

inneskeeper

Then pay me 20$ if you feel so strongly about it

inneskeeper

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Tumblr is a free website where I am paid $20

inneskeeper

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Hey tagger are you aware of the existence of any IRL dogs who speak fluent English and solve mysteries? Just curious.

ninjacat64

I’m pretty sure the Harkness test is intended for monsters/aliens, not sapient animals.

just a thought.

inneskeeper

You are fundamentally incorrect, it is intended for fictional scenarios which could not happen in real life. It is the kink equivalent of The Bechdel Test. It is proposing the absolute minimum of what is needed to ensure that the kink is #nonproblematic: Is it old enough to grant informed consent, and does it have the capability to communicate that informed consent clearly to its partners? If it fits both of these criteria, it passes the JHT and is ethically fine, though thinking it's gross or not liking it is still totally fine--it isn't saying "It's ethical so therefore you're a bad person if you dislike it. It is saying It's ethical and so therefore you should not base your disliking it in the framework of morality and ethics.

Basing your disgust of sexual fetishes and kinks in morality is fundamentally a Puritan concept: It creates the idea of wrongsex, and it justifies a framework of punishment due to perceived moral high ground. It says "You are a better person than someone who wants to fuck Scooby Doo for whatever reason, because that person is inherently morally disgusting for wanting that".

Basing your disgust of sexual fetishes and kinks in a personal dislike is fundamentally the correct ethical response: "I am not a better person for not wanting to fuck Scooby Doo for whatever reason, and someone else would not be a bad person if they wanted to fuck Scooby Doo for whatever reason".

You say that it isn't for "sapient animals", and I fully agree! Regular degular nonhuman animals cannot give an informed consent to us, be it through body language or power dynamics baked into the species difference! There's also the fundamental question of "Is this body language clear because of informed consent or because of biological nature", which is always "No, if it cannot not want to consent, it is your responsibility to ensure that its boundaries are not crossed while it holds impaired judgement".

But Scooby Doo isn't a sapient animal. Scooby Doo is a fully grown Great Dane, yes, but he speaks fluent-if-accented conversational English. He's also clearly intelligent enough to use that ability to solve criminal investigations, which gives him the ability to offer that consent in a clearly communicated way, ie human language.

That's it. I don't wanna fuck Scooby Doo. I think the concept itself is innately hilarious, because of all the things you think are sexy, you landed on the cartoon mystery-solver dog. And I chose him for this example of what passing the Harkness Test can look like explicitly because he was the most incendiary take I could think of. He is an emblem of "Just because you hate it doesn't make it immoral" in this context. It forces you to confront the possibility that you hate certain kinks because you think you have a moral high ground, and why that morality-based justification is completely false and ethically unsound. But it lets you keep your own personal boundaries--something passing the Harkness test doesn't require your approval or even your neutrality. You can totally loathe it. But you have to loathe it the same way you loathe a type of food: There is no good or bad involved. It's just not for you.

inneskeeper

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Hi! This was a lie invented by my ex to distract from their necrophilia! They openly admitted they had absolutely no proof to offer beyond a single cherrypicked screenshot where I was reacting to their paraphilia!

While I could offer more context about why exactly I felt like I was in a situation where I needed to respond positively to necrophilia, I simply do not feel like it's necessary when they also have tried to claim that I'm lying about being trans and that I'm only transitioning for online clout and to avoid blame!

Hope that helps! 🙏 😌